When the world needed you most you just up and left and went ghost. Some would say you disappeared, their magic finally worked, they ran you off the net, and I say well let them be. Child, I been over here not giving one single fuck, if it isn't the same conversation from fifty different ways, the same hoes hating, the same plots, agendas, and the same story child I'm really over it. When you got so many people trying to tell you how to do your job sometimes you have to step to the side and let them do. It may seem like a shot to the ego but in most cases some people can’t handle what you grow through, they just be in the eyes of seeing success and nothing else. I get it social media makes it seems like all you need to do is go viral and make it. And then boom you have some state of success while for some that is the case and for others it’s not. People don’t see the hard the work you put into your craft, the time it takes for you to even get your head around what you are trying to accomplish, and the focus that you hyper fixate on just to be a success story to you when you have been told a heap of no’s.
Lately I haven't been giving one single fuck because why should I care about the things that people did when they didn't care about what they were doing to me. I seen a post on Instagram last night and this lady said something I completely agree with. Now granted being halfway sleep I thought I like the post but I didn't. She was telling her followers about an event that happen in her life and joked about. She said I don’t want to talk about it because it will define who I am in the moment. Now I am paraphrasing this but she didn't want to be too much in the feels on the net about the issue at play because it was her trauma and she'll deal with accordingly. It was about an incident that happened at pride and I understood because in that moment she didn’t want it to be about them but about her. Sometimes some people forget how they hurt and we forget too because we can be so busy telling the story without ways of escape. That sometimes we can just keep going on and on and on about something that is now; how we identify ourselves, with strangers, jobs, careers, and even social media.
I've said this in many ways I am not a victim, may have been in the eyes of the abuser but I am a survivor. Meanwhile in another story someone may else beg to differ but baby am not I living for them. I wrote all this to say that baby go on and live your life because ain’t nobody stopping you but you from living. I am not talking money, the job, the success, a boyfriend, girlfriend, the husband, the love interest, and children, just you, and getting up every day whether you want to be a rainbow of sunshine or a hell of chaos. It's your life and don’t get mad at how you chose to live when them consequences comes knocking on the door. What you do sometimes don’t define you but in the eyes of father time it kinda does though. I am just not in the mood for another story and I don’t think my collective is, that is about how someone tried to take me down, block my success, steal a home, property, discredit from my ideas, played to be me to get in a room, pay someone in the legal system to slow down my money, a lying ass tongue that’s half apologizing, how my family is narcs, and how my sister is evil and so and so on.
It's old if you go back long enough I been said this. I didn’t ask you for confirmation on a story that was happening in my life. Alot of the problems the nosey pesky people have in my life is a result of you not minding your business. Instead of being a helping hand you decided to be a hinderance and that is okay because it's not my fault you a sucker for a sob story. I just find it quite idiotic how the underdog narrative is only run on those who ain’t worked for shit. Really, it's those who are sellouts if we are being honest this day and age. Just know I got it, it takes bravery, tenacity, and be able to cut another person down to remain at the top. I haven’t done it yet and I don’t think I want too neither. Shoutout to the universe for hearing my pleas and thanks to the Most High for sparing a nigga like me. I don’t think the monthly's gone be on YouTube because I been in this user-unfriendly mode. So, ima just type them up and break them down by elements on the tube. Baby I need time and me.
P.S. AND DON’T START WITH THAT SHIT. I’M TIRED FOOL. AND FOR THE COLLECTIVE PROBABLY SAYING SHE PREGNANT, HOE PLEASE! THIS PUSSY GOT TO LAST ME.