The Domino Effect (Emotional Hoarding Pt. 2)
Sometimes you can feel like the odds are stacked against you especially when you want things to unfold in a timely matter. You place this here and that here only to for something to fall apart because you got caught up in how the way things was to supposed to go or for matter to just happen. I found myself waiting this blog out because the topic was there but my emotions where invested so this message would’ve come off bias.
For me it was about how the nouns in your life can do things over time that can create barriers between you and them connecting. I mean it’s never as real as raw as the connection should be, so the times you find yourself offended or the need to defend yourself it can always seem like a struggle to do so. Because the one domino that has been placed can cause all the dominos to fall down. Meaning the foundation, emotions, or connections you have with someone. Talk about a tower moment.
I mean it seems like you find yourself blinded by what you have created versus what you can redo. I mean its hard seeing past the years and time you have invested in something but really if you’re not getting anything out of it why stay stuck and confined. I mean even if the situation is chaotic some people crave those connections from sources because without, they know it would be nothing left for them to have with that person. Especially when change isn’t on the menu for two. So, you find yourself trying to keep bits and pieces or wanting majority for self because all that matters in that moment is your needs.
That when the universe/God requires something different it can be a tug on your emotions that the only thing you see is something gone to waste. You wine, beg, plead, and adjust only to realize the thing you were trying to rebuild was missing some pieces. Maybe those pieces were the other party taking back their things as they left or maybe the fall scatter them so far that you wouldn’t find them in that moment. I mean the only emotions you can process is anger or hurt because to you all is lost. So, someone coming along saying cheer up you still have this, you tell them in anger that this is what I wanted.
Not recognizing that it may have not been what you needed. Do you know how many people miss out on dope as love connection whether it platonic or interpersonal because of their biases or still stuck on the domino effect. Caught up on what they lost versus what they could’ve salvage and learn from their mistakes. I mean its easier said than done. For me, the domino effect is when you lack speaking up for yourself or others, or taking the nouns for granted, or operating from a selfish place. I mean you could argue and say I’m not selfish I would give somebody the shirt off my back but what about the times when you needed you the most and you sacrificed you for others.
Only to go around hurting those who didn’t hurt you by not being a team player or speaking up when you needed to. Versus letting things stack up and when the chips fall you walk away pleased because of your emotional outrage. How many times does this happen for you?
Once, twice, maybe four times a year. Is it always the same scenario or a different one but with the same principle is what you should ask yourself? Because emotional accountability and emotional intelligence in that moment is nonexistent. Because I’ve asked myself and watched countless of times how people get mad when they expect them out of people only to be giving them to people who don’t deserve them. I’m not talking about in a interpersonal relationship I’m talking about those people who we try so desperately to be like or wanting to show control that we want to impress people who could a damn if we loss it all. Those are the people we give us.
In the Hoodoo Tarot there is this card called Gullah Jack, he is the hanged man meaning if you can’t do the time then don’t do the crime. In a time where fake empathy is on a rise a lot people catch themselves in situations and get mad when the outcome of situation isn’t perceived well. Because empathy in that moment is to remove you so you can see the outcome of your actions and how they can affect another. Empathy isn’t you letting things slide and avoiding speaking your truth because you feel you are wrong. Sympathy is when those around you don’t value you or hold you accountable so they get what they can from your actions.
No matter if it’s malicious intent or not they don’t care. Have you ever heard the old saying you don’t have to join a clown at a circus? We go for the show not to become the show. So, the next time you find yourself scurrying around certain conversations “about your emotions” ask yourself are you creating a domino effect. Where you stack, stack, stack, only for the tower to come crashing down. All I’m saying is every action has a reaction so no matter what you put out be receive to it right back. I don’t want no whining, fussing, and complaining because if you’re not responsible for your own actions then who is?
YOUR HUMAN YOU HAVE A HEART, A BRAIN, AND A MOUTH FOR A REASON. WE HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO PROPERLY USE THEM SO WE CAN STOP CREATING TOWER MOMENTS.
