The Disconnect With Women

We as women sometimes can be our own worst critic that it can work against us when we are looking for a sense of sisterhood in life. Over the years I have been doing soul work healing parts of me that I found no value in or wasn’t taught the value in them. The main part was my femininity and o boy I didn’t know I was out of tune with it. It affected my parenting, connecting with men, and being kind to myself when I felt I needed to go hard as a man did. I mean it’s a lot to deal with it but in the end it was worth it.

Like me and many women we find ourselves over the human connection by us being emotional beings we tend to shut out connections, before they even get a chance to start. Holding onto hurt and past resentments mistaking our emotions for being naive when in actual reality it was love. We desired it and wanted to feel it and not in a form of sexual intimacy but to be vulnerable and be able to grow into who we are supposed to be like any other woman would.

In this trying time, it can be hard to do so because we have so many women that actually operate in their masculine energy. Meaning ruining other women, challenging them from the ego, trying to crush nonexistent competition, and needing to be the only one that matters in the room. I mean men horseplay, but at the same time they can manage their presence well better in front of an enemy meanwhile us as woman can be envious and don’t even care not to hide it.

I think over all women have been taught to become something for everybody else that when its time to be the person they need to be they find themselves stuck. Stuck in the mind frame of what worked, stuck in the emotional cycles of generational hurt, and stuck in the emotional tyrant phase. That at times they can work against themselves and others because of the lack of emotional intelligence. I may refer to the term women but if you operate in feminine energy a lot it’s possibly so you may find yourself stuck in this cycle as well.

But at this time, I found myself seeing women in the eye of being cruel, malicious, envious, spiteful, and non-nurturing. It was off putting at first but over the time it dawned on me how the masculine energies don’t even process their emotions that they think its normal for women to be overly needy and emotionally controlling. I mean we’re all human so why does one of the other gets to have some sort hierarchy over the other. Can’t we all just get along. (What movie is this from?) Seriously.

So down below I wrote some things you probably identify with in a negative manner and how to address them. Sorry for the lengthy message but feminine energies always want some long drawn out explanation. So, if you find yourself doing so that’s where it’s come from.

EMOTIONAL BIAS-

Chile in my whole human experience I have found myself at odds with my feminine energy and other women alone and keep in mind I used to date them. I mean you can be attracted to the same/ opposite sex and still don’t emotionally get them. As I decided to evolve in life and experience things, I noticed how bashful women where when it came to things that they liked say for instance if was sex, love, money, or hell anything they would be so shut off. Now tricky part about it was the fact that women would judge other women for the things they do privately.

Now, that shit came from pleasing masculine energies needing the approval of males because we are from them and they are from us so finding the balance between the two can be tricky. Men over time have become the most selected individuals for positions that I think they should not have been. Not because of the emotional difference sometimes it’s the experience they lack or the inability to get out and get experience. Men are more of I found what I like and I’m sticking to it kind of individuals it’s just getting him to find it first.

Now because of southern ways, racism, systematic oppression, and women rights women have found themselves always please and catering to the masculine energies. Meanwhile the other group of women where filled with rage and hate that they end pouring that energy into their own kind which is women. So, a woman choosing to be whatever she choices to be can be hard for some women to digest because they rely more on the opinions of others versus themselves. I mean the only time a woman is willing to trust herself is when she knows her partner is cheating on her. TRUE STORY!!

So, I wrote this to say the next time you find yourself challenged by someone else’s mind or actions ask yourself am I been forceful. I mean as women we can have a leading spirit its only if it is done in an empathic form. Not just trying to control like men do only to have to be forced down by pride. Ask yourself why does this bothers me so much? Start asking yourself who are you not who she think is? Because that takes away from you and the other party. Last but least learn you and take time to nurture yourself. You are love and you embody it so stop trying to force others and people to love you by catering to their needs before yours. AHT AHT AHTT!!

THE PHYSICAL FLAWS-

What is the need to pinpoint another woman’s insecurities when you’re uncomfortable with yourself? Does someone else’s happiness take away from you? Now I know you nicely shaped women would say girl I don’t care but if you didn’t get the masculine approval would you though? I mean men like to control so over the time the things you love about you, you could eventually start to hate. Especially when your emotional needs aren’t met. This is why women feel so comfortable with tearing each other down because we around individuals who allow this to happen to them or didn’t know how to put an end to it.

So, we mirror this within other women. We don’t know how to say your slip is showing while pulling her to side to correct this. We allow her to parade around with her flaws showing because were either hiding our own flaws or filled with some resistance to her presence. I mean honestly ever since social media has been popping all you see is women getting exposed by masculine energies and women doing the same to other women. Sometimes it’s entertaining to yall but to me I get turned off.

And when I’m turned off, I don’t want to communicate with women/men because geesh they can be cruel have you seen mean girls. Well the next time you find yourself stuck or emotionally blocked ask yourself when is the last time you have heard something nice about you? When have you said something nice about you? When have you stood in front of the mirror naked and just said okay? (in a high-pitched voice)! I like to tell myself I have a big butt when really, I only have hips. O well it works it gives me an extra pep in my step so when I’m walking I’m swinging that thang. You don’t even know what you are looking at but you looking though.

Love you with out the validation an approval from your kids, your job, parenting, your husband, bae, wife, girlfriend, or anything besides you. OKAY! YOU GOT THIS!

THE INABLITY TO LISTEN:

Child we all seen our parents have a conversation or going to return something and they had the great debate with someone in customer service. That your mom, grand mom, aunt, or sibling was probably wrong, but the person got tired of arguing that they eventually gave up. So, we went home thinking yes, my mama won when actually reality your mama was wrong as hell. You don’t know the countless of times I have watched my mama do this and I thought to myself where did she get this shit from?

Because she would be so emotionally fired up that she didn’t get what she needed done only to turn around and still need to ask for assistance but didn’t so she ended up manipulating a situation. Causing more harm than good. Child, that’s emotional blackmail and the emotional tyrant. You do not know the countless times masculine energies have said what am I doing wrong? She’s not communicating I have done this, but this isn’t working she doesn’t know what she wants. He says every time I try to have talk to, she doesn’t listen and doesn’t communicate her needs just everybody else’s.

Now mind you if you are a man whose reading this, this can apply to you to this can be the reason you find yourself challenged on taking a back seat when it comes to the emotional problems. Baby boomers are the most apathetic creatures and they had offspring’s who do this with their kids. And they do this with their kids causing some sort of hierarchy in the family and friends dynamic. This is why people do the extreme when it comes down to communicating their emotional, mental, or physical wellbeing.

You or the other party may find yourself arguing a lot and saying hurtful things because calm and rational doesn’t work for you because you haven’t been studying you and your background. Being empathic is the ability to listen without judgement so you can see what the other party needs. Sympathetic is selective listening meaning you only hear what you can relate to and tune out what you really need to hear.

If you struggle with listening try expanding your attention span whether it be watching television, movies, creative hobbies, and silence. Know that everything isn’t about you there are 330 million people who live in America and you landed yourself in a situation with someone who has had a different experience to life from you. If you don’t listen well, you probably are impatient with yourself and high key negative towards you and others. Love, patience, empathy, understanding, and listening is free and a form of intimacy.