Sometimes it’s okay to cry and that’s perfectly fine. Sometimes when the body isn’t used to processing your emotions the way to release the pain is to cry. I mean not in a sense of being sad but to release what you keep hostage in the mind, body, and spirit. Have you ever found yourself uncomfortable but not comfortable enough to verbally communicate what is going on emotionally that crying seems useless? I mean you probably have had somethings buried deep into the subconscious that your day today emotions where probably effected by it.
I mean it isn’t an issue but maybe something happened, or something triggered it maybe a new path in life has shed some light into the darkness that you probably feel attacked. Or stuck with urge to resist what is in front of you because you don’t feel worthy of freedom. I asked all this to say do you write yourself soul notes. I’m talking about the things you don’t feel comfortable enough to say out loud the things that block you in life with connecting to yourself.
The things that keep you bound and afraid of unleashing into the abyss because you have suppressed or numbed a part of you that you needed the most. But life happens and the world just keep on turning a yet here you are with a fist full of tears. Because letting go isn’t easy and seeing light in the darkness isn’t always fun. Because that fear, turmoil, and hurt has served its purpose for a period of time. I just want to say forgive yourself.
For what you did not know and what others didn’t know. Forgive yourself for the person who you used to be. Forgive yourself for being forced to grow up so fast in big cruel world. Forgive yourself for being happy while those you seek to hurt destroyed your happiness. Forgive yourself for being exposed to the unknown without no protection and coverage. Forgive yourself for walking paths alone and questioning who you are because of where you were. Forgive yourself and the emotions.
Forgive yourself for being so strong that feeling any emotion that is tethered to your pain is suffering for you. Forgive yourself for feeling like the world was against you because no one was with you. Forgive yourself for staying in an emotional place unconsciously. Forgive yourself so you can feel like you again.
If you ever hit a point in life where faith can be challenging, and you feel alone write yourself a soul letter. A letter that speaks of the imperfections and the things you desire to come up with, the change you seek. Pour your heart out to you because you deserve to hear you. Let the emotions flow and the tears fall as the pen moves across the paper. Get it out all out and be done with holding it inside. As you finish up writing send yourself back love, peace, hope, joy, and honesty. Write on the bottom of the page. When your done go outside and light it and let it burn in the grass. If you stay in an apartment just light in a nonflammable can and dump the ashes in the grass or light the paper on the stove and remove the ashes by using a paper towel and disposing of it. No this will not put hole in your grass. The reason why I say throw the ashes in the grass because you are giving back to earth.
What doesn’t serve you and acknowledging your path towards life and releasing the emotions of today. It is the pain, hurt, and discontentment that is no longer your passenger and it needs to be released. Not held up in journal to be a reminder of the hurt you frequently visit like all the other notes. This is you giving yourself a break and an understanding that the journey to come will be conquered and you will win. You are not your mistakes and mishaps. You are not the childhood trauma, emotional trauma, emotional blockages, the mental blockages that try to keep you bound. You are love, free, flawed, and human.
I release you from the pain you love more than yourself.
A LETTER TO MY INNER CHILD, MY CHILD, AND THE MOTHER I AM!