MENTAL HEALTH CHECK:
Feeling like a fresh bald headed hoe on the scene how is y’all doing? As for me surviving this heat got me about to summon my ancestors and perform a rain ritual because its hot. I'm a winter baby so me and heat don’t get along I ain’t seen one of y’all summer babies taking about it feels good outside in about two months. How sway I really don’t want it to rain we just need a lil air on outside like enough to change your mood for the better. I mean this weather don’t even give a mood it’s just whew do I really need to go to the store today. Enough of that that though.
You know what I miss when we used to share and acknowldge each other. Not you messy boots and drama starters I’m talking about us normal people who just living just to live at this point it’s like earth got a mind of it’s on. And we just on here thugging it out waiting on a deity or something to say get yo ass over there or even check in and say how y’all doing. Now for you over sharerers you can leave you sex life out of it because some of y’all go to far into details for me. I don’t need that in my life ima good Christian woman who doesn’t participate in those foolishness. LMAO! Some English major is scrolling through this saying how does these words even make a sentence. Easy just type it up and let the public argue about it when I walk away from my laptop it’s on you and God to deal with it. It's too hot to engage in such things. I like to live my life a ditsy bitch so far, it’s got me nowhere but I'm at peace though.
Meanwhile you over there scared to just say fuck this and stop giving it your attention. I know it's hard for my people who do suffer with some form of mental illness, but you do it when you're going through a manic episode so why not do it now. I mean it’s possible to do it in a healthy way. It's just getting the consistency out of yourself, making sure you stay away from stressors, acknowledge the toxicity that tries to come into your life, and staying good at your own needs. I know right it seems like a lot but it’s really not because these are the things you need to be a better human for you, your kids, lover, bae, boo, family, friend, and job. Being selfish in a non-offensive way is possible. #PYA! You know my motto if I don’t have it to give I don’t. #PYA. One of y’all baby daddies sending me love songs from the 90’s ask him what he want I ain’t got time for his shenanigans.
If he gone stress me out tell him gone on now life is hard and its hot right now. He trying to do winter time activities in the summer. And when I say baby daddy, I'm talking about the single one the one whose kids is 5 and up. Not the one you still fucking on when times get hard and you behind on the rent. I mean in this economy child; I don’t blame you! Mr. Earl be calling me to come back but I told him I got to find my way he thinks I'm going after a Mr. Charles. In the words on Cookie Lyon, “I GOT TO PUT ME FIRST LUCIOUS, I GOT TO PUT ME FIRST LUCIOUS!
Y’all probably reading this like girl where the tips at I need in another blog post somewhere I ain’t posted yet. But you know what you need right a laugh and hope. You too serious all the time. Look at you lying in bed scrolling down on your phone on your left side arm about to go numb because you been on TikTok all day. You ain’t had one cup of water and a decent meal all day. You haven't even tasted and tested the outside weather to get a little sunshine on your feet and connect with Mother Nature. Have you cleaned up your timeline yet? Have you cut back on that mentally confusing shit yet you watch all the time? Have you stop engaging in things on your timeline that mirror your real life?
Especially if you have been trying to manifest at the moment. Use social media as your vision board to create the lifestyle you want. You want healing go follow a healer. You want bravery go follow somebody climbing mountains with no ropes. That’s some dangerous shit right there because them motherfucker ain’t scared of nothing. Watch the way people energetic and emotionally connect with on social media. You control your own vibration they don’t that’s why you have certain people and algorithms who panhandle to your emotional needs. You tied of following that toxic positive asz bitch YET? BLOCK HER AND NEVER LOOK BACK! You won’t miss out a damn thing if she chooses not to grow up then o well. You can always spin the block and see how somebody doing.
Child, I just caught a nigga and slide a piece of paper in his mailbox because he acts like his phone not working. If he doesn’t respond you know what ima do be pissed but I will express it because that is my right. It doesn’t have to be to him but I can allow those emotions to come over me. As an emotional hoarder where I tend to let shit build up, I find it’s best to address, acknowledge, and come up with a tangible solution for me. Because if you let me sit on something to long boy, I'm worsier than the damn FBI when it comes to problems. Blame it on my mercury placement it's my sun sign. Not saying I'm going to do something crazy. But I'll be at home running back every scenario like a 1000 puzzle piece game. So, it’s best for me to face my fears early on because it can lead me to self-sabotage and create strife and unnecessary tension where it's not needed.
I'm normal just like you I just learned me better than anyone and in my free time I like to people watch. And humans can tell you a lot by the thing they do, what they wear, how they talk, how the smile, how they don’t smile, or even live in fear. Being there for everyone taught me I had great listening skills which made me feel like I had to find ways to comfort people which became my detriment. Because when I needed help, I didn’t get the help I needed and in true Scorpio fashion whose going to know you when you don’t let them. Looks shocked by my own shit. In all honestly, I barely had time to talk about my own shit because I was always handling everybody else's. But when life broke for me I said I got to find a better way to feel because I hated being sad all the time.
Girl, I cried for almost 3 years straight at home not in public you guys didn’t deserve to see me at my lowest like that. That black pride something else and it almost lead down a long road battling issues that wasn’t mines. Family expectations, soul ties, spiritual ascension, dark knight of the soul, realizing I was the karmic even I wasn’t on nothing weird, and how it was time for me to grow up. How I didn’t embody my true solar polar. How I had to be pushed to show off my skills, strength, and emotions. And at times it wasn’t the best but hey it’s better out than in. Just know your actions do have consequences. 😉
But, I'm here I'm working on showing up more with these messages but a hoe got’s to make this car note and bill money. Now if y’all want to find a sponsor, investor, or a donor who isn't weird then let me know. If not, I be tired as hell and my sleeping schedule is out of wack. I started writing this at 2 and why did it feel like t was 6 in the morning though. That neither here or nor there. I hope you guys are having a great day too. Got me baking in this damn heat.