Where do we start child am I the only person that has been annoyed with every being on this planet? It’s not like you don’t emotionally identify with them but if feels as if you are on Mars and they are on Earth. I say that in the most non gratifying way. It’s like you just are sitting in a tree while watching humans do the most annoying things ever. I get it life without the normal routine has been having its downfalls.
Watching people pickup things, they complained about to lose all over again, the constant need to feel something while feeling nothing at all, and the constant emotional whirlwinds people are going through. Whew, heavy sigh. Child, I keep saying Coviesha is doing more than attacking the immune system baby she’s is chipping away at the minds of people. And when I say mind’s, I’m not talking about people who suffer with mental illness. I’m talking about critical thinking skills, common sense, and emotional awareness.
I mean to get off I have to vent. So, listen these pass four months has been so emotionally exhausting to me child I have been literally having the urge to write, but not the creative space to write. To top it off it’s been the same emotionally heated arguments with people who just like to hear themselves talk and to see what they feel is right.
Child that’s why I tell y’all to not be out here arguing with everybody because some people just be ready to identify the wrong in your response because of their unsettled with their emotional choices. They really do be doing that and that is emotionally draining. Some people that I deal with on a constant day to day basis love to complain about being emotionally taken advantage while they do the same thing to others. I mean empathy and sympathy is only so much before a person goes into their human experience.
A lot of people plague themselves with the idea of me always being quiet. It is because certain people don’t be worthy of my human experience. Now to you, that may seem rude but the work I have put in for me to be able to live freely in my truth it is the opposite. Child in this walk of life while doing spiritual work and balancing real life it was once upon a time where I felt I had to be one or the other. When it came down to who I was talking to or coexisting with.
Because meanwhile the spiritual me was still being used for my gifts and the human me was depriving myself of what I truly needed to be whole. I was no longer trying to only identify with parts of me that I wanted. I needed all of me and that is when I discovered what I truly was worthy of. I wasn’t trying to force myself into places where I didn’t belong. Child have you ever tried to put on your, get it girl jeans while you were bloated baby that shit will have you in a midlife crisis. Starting a whole diet in two minutes and ready to work out for the rest of your life because you ate bad the week before your period.
Now you bloated and pissed because you ain’t living up to these unrealistic goals you set in a time of need while you were having a human experience. Child it isn’t a rule book to spirituality. The ones that come out with books where smart enough to document their experience of the time. Because each day is a day to grow and learn.
Child vulnerability and making decisions from that state of mind rarely work out for anyone. Did you not read the blog about me wanting to have a hoe phase after my breakup with my last lover in 2014? No ma’am I still think I need redo or some. Because a nigga owes me a dog, a house, a car, a unicorn, some money, a book deal, some head, and a million dollars so I can travel the world and write. Did I get it or my expectations was too high?
I think I just didn’t plan on the idea of someone trying to lock me down while I was trying to be the beautiful h** I am. If my future lover is reading this, I am not a h**. I just like to label myself as things that have a more in-depth meaning to life. While you’re reading this part of the blog like my nigga said this b**** was a h**. Who you gone listen to your heart or your hating a** friends?
Girl, it’s time for me to get off of here because the nigga coming out of me. But I don’t have a creative block I just haven’t had time to write and think in peace. If you going on a vacation anytime in these upcoming months and all expenses is on you. Call me or email me. My booking info on Instagram it says call Jesus and he’ll let me know if you straight or not.
For real doe put me in the game coach.
A Nigga That’s Trying To Come Up