Interracial Dating can be a subject that is hard to talk about especially if you are of the opposite ethnicity of the desired couple that is dating. Now in no shape form or fashion is this about someone else’s relationship. This is just the basic how to dummy preview from my eyes. Now if you don’t know me, I am black woman identified as an African American female who reside in the United States.
Some of you scroll pass my picture on the page and just gets to reading shouts out to you for messing with me that much. Now every time the subject comes up about interracial relationship you always see in the African American community how women become enraged and the African males do not. We throw out the cliché things about white women being more submissive, kinkier, and a better listener than the African American woman.
For me I want to speed past that because we will get to that topic in a minute. The question I have is that when someone is stating an opinion, or a question why are quick to throw out the term racist or call someone a closed minded inidivual? Now I don’t live in some fairytale land where racists, systemic oppression, slavery, and bondage still isn’t playing out today.
If it is clarity we are searching for and equality why do, we have to dance around those topics? I mean if we are two individuals who were having a debate about certain experiences, we have had with other ethnicities why is one more prone to hate their own race or the other? This are questions I ask for your feedback and answers I will give.
Now let’s gets into the nitty gritty in the black community the most common thing for black women to say is that white woman is stealing our men. Not in this economy maybe having sex but marring them no ma’am. A lot them are catching on that these men are emotionally damaged. Sorry true story not all men but some are okay.
Now when this usually is thrown out it is because of the colorism that has went on in the black community from the time when slavery was at an all-time high. You know the old term house nigga versus field nigga. The house nigga was someone who had a nice shade of skin color that master liked because she favored white and had eccentric features. The darker you were the more prone you were to be a field nigga to work outside with the men and children.
Now this is where the colorism has taken effect and damaged the black community because the woman who were a lighter skin color had to deal with being raped and ostracized from the fellow blacks. Creating the crabs in a bucket mentality when one fellow black seen that another one getting privileges that the other wasn’t, they automatically assumed they loved their life.
Overtime light skin women became the basic identity of sex appeal because she also took advantage of being desired and getting the attention of the men leaving women to question their worth by the color of their skin. In the time of slavery, black people were taken from their homes, forced to move to another country, and put on boats to be slaves to fellow white men in the country. After a fellow black man had sold the first batch of African Americans into slavery.
I know, I know right we really don’t talk about his ass enough like what the hell made him do that shit! Girl enough because the lower vibrational me is about to jump out. So, while all this was going on in the United States caucasian women were forced to compete with slaves for their husband attention. So, seeing her husband be mean, cruel, and vicious and trying to contain a human as if it was pet. So, this let her use her anger towards the black woman because her husband wasn’t emotionally available.
Now this is where the stereotypes come in when it came to the women female body parts how black women were curvaceous and caucasian women were not. This is why women want to get a Brazilian Butt Lift black woman say caucasian women are cultural appropriating. Hey some are, and some are not but this is where we in todays society. One click away from starting the whole segregation process all over again.
But over time we have allowed men’s perspective to separate two individuals from knowing each other side of the story even if you don’t want to be cool with each other. I just find that educating each other and understanding where you stand with your fellow woman is way more important that trying to kill yourself to be the next best thing for a man.
I mean boys like who like them if were being honest, depending on his zodiac, and upbringing we women really be killing ourselves to be something they could careless for.
Now in no shape form or fashion am I excluding the history that has occurred between two races that ended with blacks suffering from psychological, emotional, and spiritual blocks. But come-on half of the men we complain about be no good as men if we are being honest. They be one bone away from the doghouse. For me I have true disgust for black men who date outside of their race after he has damaged every black woman he has come in contact with.
I mean the psychological strong hold slavery has had on men have them thinking that they can seek redemption in another being because they’re more social accepted. IT’S WEIRD! No ma’am those same drug problems, abusive tendencies, and selective cheating spells is still going to be there. Newsflash the same way black women was taught to be serving to their man because of the pressures they had to deal with caucasian women had to as well.
They just believed they had to stand by their man through every obstacle even if he is wrong. Us black women on the other hand hide our shame, pain, and fear being vulnerable because of the predatory stance we have with certain men. They just knew when to cash out on their husbands and leave you ask me that psychological abuse from humans is so downright nasty. Ughhkkk!
But for me there has to be something from my black fellow Americans that has to be understood. A lot of things we weren’t taught and the things we learn, we keep it tight like the Krabby Patty formula. We judge our own and lack the compassion to teach without condemning someone first. The first cord of distrust was sowed when we were sold into slavery because of money.
When our fellow black men come into money, fame, or riches where’s the first place they run to? When our fellow black women come into education and money who are the men she looks down on? When our fellow black man is in pain who does he comes running to? When we as women experience pain from our fellow natives who do we run to?
You ask me we ever stand together because that Willie Lynch era has us so tore up to the point that we don’t know how to not try to dominate and click up with the in crowd. And we sit and wonder why other people of another color are able to come in and help even if they have good intentions or not. We judge each other harshly for not wanting to suffer so we all make selfish moves and then learn selfish lessons.
I say all this to say that I am not dismissing the pick me’s, the colorism, injustices, the lack of awareness, cultural appropriation, and the biasness against our own.
I say all this to say that we can go round and around about our worldly views but what are we doing as whole to understand the value of perception.
UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN!