Honoring your emotions can be a tricky thing when you base them off outside influences. Example let’s just say that you woke up in a good mood and then you go somewhere, and everyone is a shitty mood. Do you leave or stay is the first question? Or do you push your emotions to the side to take on everybody else’s mood? If you take on everybody else’s emotions and end up feeling bad about your circumstances, then you haven’t honored yours first.
Most people who suffer from anxiety or some form of mental illness try to base their emotions off of other people. And like humans who grew up in environments or haven’t mentally grew out of that ugly duckling phase end up basing their reality off of other people. You don’t have to have some spiritual power to be able to pick on up uneasy feelings. But the question is are they yours or another person perception of what they perceive life at the moment?
Now in emotional blackmail I wrote about particular individuals who don’t know how to enjoy the party, so they find away of becoming it. Whether it be taking away from your light and redirected it to them. Yeah, its grimy in these streets when you start valuing your peace over destruction, drama, gossip, and deceit. People hate when your emotional solid in yourself.
Honestly how this conversation came about because I got to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes that I didn’t sign up for. And let me tell you baby it was emotional draining and annoying to me. Not the person but the energy because for one it wasn’t mines. And the girls be out here teaching and leeching off people energies. And when I said girl that can be guys too. And in most cases people who do energy work don’t understand the energy they carry sometimes don’t be theirs to bare.
Because it can cause havoc in your auras, chakras, and your physical body. Why you think I get so defensive when somebody be trying to speak over my life especially when its negatively and I haven’t done nothing to them. Baby they can take that dangerous and projective style energy right back to themselves. Don’t be out here letting people do that to you because you are deserving of some peace in your life.
People be knowing who to play and when they can’t, they start to act real funny when they can’t just peep game and pay attention. Now I do have to insert this because some of y’all do be antagonistic and starting drama so remember the energy you give off you are bound to receive it back some way or another. That doesn’t just apply to just magic my love.
But let’s get back on track a lot of people fail to recognize outside of family history of mental illness. Anybody mood can change or stay the same based on current experiences that play out in your life. The starters for mental health issues are finances, love, family, and children. Sometimes it can be traumatic experiences or major changes that are happening that you haven’t found yourself comfortable in.
A lot of people fail to recognize that those vulnerable times in your life is where try to make drastic decision to make yourself feel good. And like most we stay to the course of action because at once it made you happy. So, we revisit it thinking that maybe if we try again, I will get the fulfillment I need. When in actual reality is just accepting the fact and moving on from it. If I told you that everything in your life wasn’t karmic but a clone of your own behavior, would you believe me.
Now this don’t go for those of y’all that’s in a karmic cycling fighting for your life. Apply the advice where you see fit. But today I had to remind myself that I don’t have to take on anything that isn’t mines. I told y’all I’m in the energy of it is what it is! I’m over the accuses for the bad behavior, the lack of care for other people, and self-centered individuals. It gets old like why should you as a person continuously make excuses and always have to see something from someone else point of view when they won’t see it form yours. I mean make it make sense.
In this day and age where everybody is being petty and playing tit for tat finally standing up for yourself is going to feel like you’re being petty. My aunt told me a long time ago its better out than in. She said you’re going to hold all that stuff in and have some aneurysm. While they out here living they life an you still mad. She said forget how it comes off you’ll learn how to speak when you’re ready.
And baby that advice was giving to me in 2011 and has stuck with me ever since she gave it to me. I took me a minute to get it right because I told y’all I was chronic weed smoker. I didn’t let the weed smoke me; I smoked the weed to embody some form of my own sanity. It kept me emotional suppressed, and it was a way of containing the things I really wanted to say.
I was so hot headed that if you knew I was messed up person I would do shit just to keep you at bay. I was my own worst enemy because the people who I chose to hang around where always negative and nit pickers. And child that got annoying so to keep them away from me I would do things that I know hit their morals. So, the whole entire time they think they are staying away when I really was pushing them away first. I mean it sucks but it was true. Now, I’m so good on me I’ll let you push a whole narrative without running to my own defense.
Because for me to do all that instead of communicating it and being comfortable in my truth and walk away. Showed me I valued their thoughts a lot more than my own. How dare I complain about the things I didn’t want to change, how dare I keep dealing with people who mean me no good and expecting different results, and how dare I demand peace when I didn’t have it in myself. I get it’s apart of human nature to want someone to embrace you when you’re acting like a fool.
But if you don’t surround yourself with people like this. How are you going to get it? When you learn you also learn that certain people can’t give you what it is YOU need because they don’t have it like you didn’t. Now it is some dope souls out here that will give you the things you lack, but they also have their limits too because they value themselves to, and they had to learn when to walk away.
In a world where respect is earned it sholl ain’t never taught. I wrote all this to say that it’s actually dope as f*** when you wake up in the morning and honor you first. Whether that is you saying I’m sad, happy, angry, anxious, or full of joy. It is you taking time to notice things about you that you may or may not want to change.
So, the days you need others to show up for you just know we can start day by day to show up for ourselves. By honoring our emotions first. Be selfish in non-selfish way with you.
TATA! LOVE BUGS