Black Family Drama Pt 2.

What is going on with the collective energy. Family getting into it about money, people arguing about life insurance money, and baby mothers and baby fathers in competition with each other. Marriages falling apart because folks trying to act single, and couples treating each other like the enemy. WHAT IN THE GHETTO RHETORIC IS GOING ON HERE?

Last time we left off talking about how our elders still had some of us living out that slave mentality pertaining to the hierarchy in families. How mothers feel entitled to their children’s money, fathers pushing their sons to be the man they wanted to be, and children hating other children for being able to be happy because of the way their parents let them live. Girl these tarot readings has been real ghetto lately and ion like that in my (Caresha voice). If I spelled your name wrong just go with it.

But because unemployment money is drying up for some of the collective yall really been showing yall ass. In Memphis the courthouse had 6,000 pending evictions before COVID-19, so folks had time to create a payment plan to pay on that rent. I have been dumb with money before so I ain’t judging nobody but for the folks who pay their bills you had kinfolks begging for money. Some of yall had folks watching yall kids and didn’t even offer to bring groceries or pay them gas money at least. So, now work has officially started backup and some of yall thinking sister, cousin, brother, and grandmama supposed to watching kids for free.

While grandma has been exhausting all her resources trying to take care your kids burdening her other kids for money when they feel grandma should say no. And when I say grandma, I mean the oldest or youngest person who babysitting the kids while everybody at work. This shit is still playing out in this day age as I seen my grandma go through this same thing. You’ll be amazed at the at the burdens our ancestors toted on their back only for us to put a stop to them in a healthy way but because we don’t, they become the most unbearable lessons.

But because niggas and money don’t go hand in hand, I didn’t say black folks and money I said niggas in money don’t go hand and hand it doesn’t. Niggas get money and start forgetting about the important shit that goes in they life like bills, kids, and those that help them out. Baby in the black community we some of the most pocket watching, emotional manipulating, and selfish mother*******.

And have the nerve to say family ain’t family no more but will pay a daycare to half watch they damn kids and think family is supposed to do shit for free. I keep telling yall it ain’t no more elders in the community we all we got and acting like selfish negroes. But let me get back on my rant though. Money has been one of the most stressing topics because in the last blog post I mentioned about men being the sole providers and being privy to more financial opportunities back in the day that it gave them some unwarranted power.

Thinking they could drop the kids off on they mamas while the one that needed help couldn’t get it. But the one who was suffering couldn’t receive help because they mirrored mama and daddy pain. And in the black community speaking on our emotions or how family has hurt you isn’t a topic most like to hear because they feel they had no wrongs in raising they children and they did the best they could. Now I do say our parents did do the best they could but that still don’t give them the excuse to continue to act the same way this day age.

Right is right and wrong is wrong and accountability will always be just that. I said the other day the reason why so many narcissist individuals exist in this day and age is because their parents rarely had time to show emotions so when he/she started growing into their body and getting compliments from the world they relied on that. And when he/she got the job, the car, the marriage or the fame first it created the narrative that they were always the good person they intended to be.

This is why so many of us rely on social media for happiness didn’t I say we are living in the 80’s era drugs, sex, prostitution, marriage, babies, and careers all instant gratification type things. Yeah that’s the world we live in this day and age and it’s sad. Because COVID really rocked a lot of people worlds because like many we weren’t taught about how to upkeep homes, cars, marriages, and kids we just went along with the flow. So being exposed to what you flaunt to the world on a day to day basis became real when the cameras shut off.

When the job didn’t call you in, when the kids didn’t go to school, and when the night out with girls came to halt everybody world came crashing down. When you see the folks, you adored don’t relate to you no more because they don’t understand your pain or they ain’t the best secret keepers. That shit hurted only to run to back family you been distance from because they hurt you when you were younger. So, now that you need that time to heal to be understood they can’t understand because of the time you’ve spent away.

I mean it seems as if nobody cares and your truth don’t matter at the moment, but it does. If you ain’t mama/daddy favorite your life seems to be none existing to them. Even if you’ve lost a parent and are looking for that someone to care about you to be understood it seems pointless right. But it be love all around you, its folks in marriages and relationships craving for the intimacy from a partner the way they relate to their parent but too afraid to be vulnerable.

I mean that’s what COVID taught me for those folks who try to be better than their parents to actually be better than themselves to allow themselves room to grow. But because we push this narrative of family when blood is actually to be related and family is those that are actually of support who don’t desire things from you. I mean its family out here like that but yall sometimes abuse them because that is what big mama and mama allowed and a lot of us ain’t going for that no more.

So, people family is changing and switching up on them when its actually the opposite they’re sitting back and observing others go after the things they want and need and starting to do that for themselves. I mean I am only as strong as my weakest link. I mean if we’re being honest this is why a lot of women/men get in relationships with abusive partners because we’ve seen this in our family. Even if you didn’t let men/women beat on you it’s just the suppressive energy you gave to those children. So, they sought out freedom to only to be held captive by another oppressor.

That slave mentality is real and a lot of us are living that out. It amazes me that black folks have kids and can’t wait till their children get 18 to go to college or to a get job only to remind them that they owe for being on earth. I mean some of us would’ve preferred our parents to use a condom. I mean geesh I’m not the only one who thinks like this. Parents feeling entitled to money and don’t even teach money management and get mad when they see their children going through evictions and struggling to pay bills because they left the nest to soon.

Getting mad when kids saying they’ll leave even their broke because at least they’ll have freedom on there on. See when you hit 18 you think you grown you want to experience life and other grown folks don’t like it when other grown folks in their home. They don’t treat you as equals even if you are going half on the bills, they just start to complain about what you need to do. Forcing you to get out and say I didn’t tell you to get out. Nawl shawty ima show you I’m grown and let’s not talk about the parents who use money to emotional manipulate they children.

And wonder why they either end up in relationship with men who emotional abuse them or men who aren’t financially stable because he gives them freedom and bliss. See black folks don’t like to sit down and reflect on how they affect others its always what they want. Especially folks with kids, Hell this why baby mamas be expecting they baby daddies to be Superman because they are running from you (THE PARENT). And the same for baby daddies looking to be supported by another woman well not financially but in a loving type state.

I mean it’s real that’s why folks be in relationships mad as hell cause they partner don’t take away from that family drama they have. I mean your spouse is a supporter not a damn caretaker and I’m not talking about financially. I MEAN WHO’S GOING TO BREAK THE DAMN CURSE? I mean siblings hating each other because they don’t come around anymore. Siblings mad at each other because parents got favorites and ain’t afraid to show it.

Sibling mad at each other because one outgrew them and finally let go of that toxic family dynamic shit. I mean when is our elders is going to step up. It’s like we are waiting on the next generation to be better than us and hopefully they learn from our mistakes when we don’t even want to fix our own.

As much as it pains me to say this but family ain’t the same no more. They can be your biggest downfall because they refuse to pull their weight emotionally, spiritually, financially, mentally, and physically. I MEAN WHO’S GOING TO BREAK THE CURSE AND WHEN THEY BREAK IT ARE YOUR COMING OUT OF THE DUNGEON?